Do You Want Change or Do You Want Happiness?
There is nothing to change.
Pause.
I invite you to let that sink in if you will.
There is nothing to change.
Your thinking mind might now be saying things like:
“But I need to lose weight!”
“I need to get along better with my children – boss – direct reports.”
“I need to be a better leader.”
“I need to change careers, make more money, get a raise, pay off debt.”
“I need to ….” You fill in the blank.
And why do we want to change any of that? Usually, it is because we want to feel better in some way: happier, more peaceful, more fulfilled, more loving, more secure.
We seek happiness (or these similar experiences) by changing something about our lives, yet, our happiness is always with us, in the background. That is who we essentially are.
Who we are is OneBeing, Source, Spirit, Awareness, Consciousness, Divine Wisdom (whatever name resonates). We are one with all that is. Everything and everyone arise from this Awareness and is made of this Awareness.
Whatever is happening, whatever conditions exist, whatever situation we are in or result we have – already is – has already been allowed.
Who we truly are is the open, empty allowing space of pure Awareness.
We overlook that this is who we are because we focus on all of the activity, thoughts, feelings, relationships in our lives. Yet we are the space out of which all of these arise.
The fact that something appears to us means that we, Awareness, have already said yes to it.
Consider the space in the room in which you are now. If an angry person came barreling into the room, what would the space do? Nothing; it would allow it. What if a sweet toddler entered, what would the space do? Nothing. It is an open, neutral space.
There is nothing to change in the space of the room. The space doesn’t have a need to change anything.
That space would have no ability to stop the angry person from entering the room. Only some other object or being could appear within the space and be able to stop it.
Our thinking minds are like that apparently separate object that wants to stop or change what is happening. We experience a thought or a feeling and we resist the current circumstances.
When we begin to wrestle with a circumstance we would like to change, we energize it with our attention. What we say we want to change thrives on that attention and remains due to that attention.
Our thinking mind resists what we don’t like and seeks what we say we would like instead. Both activities of the mind take us away from our current situation in order to attempt to experience happiness.
If we don’t resist what it is we say we want to change, and don’t seek to replace it with something that is not present, then what we have left is what is in front of us now.
When we rest in our essential nature of peace and happiness, Awareness will inform us as to what there is to do or not do.
As we notice our reaction to releasing the possibility of having to change, we might observe that our identity and habitual emotional patterns are tied up with these things we think need to change.
Who would you be if you allowed yourself to weigh what you weigh, make the money you make, continue to treat people the same?
The thinking mind wants to judge everything. Yet, our essential nature is just as the open space: allowing.
If some of the self-talk has receded, and you have let it sink in that there is nothing to change, what do you feel?
You might notice some relaxation, i.e., some form of peace.
Or you might experience emotions that have been there but have gone unnoticed due to your attention on what it is you want to change.
We can release our judgments, conversations and patterns that don’t align with our inherent nature of love, peace and happiness. So, you might ask, “Doesn’t that mean I’m changing something?”
We can’t change who we essentially are: love, peace, happiness, fulfillment. If we believe we are anything other than that, then we want to release that belief. Yes, easier said than done.
We aren’t changing who we are but letting go of who we are not. So, initially it can feel a bit like “change,” but it is a releasing.
In my experience it is so much more peaceful and satisfying to reside in my essential nature, which I already am, than trying to change something to eventually become peaceful and happy.
So, you ask, what about these 22 pounds? If you allow yourself to experience your essential nature and decide to align all of your activities, relationships, thoughts, feelings and actions with that knowing, and allow your thinking mind to take a rest, your true self will know what there is to do, if anything.
We can quit fighting with ourselves, resisting where we are, which keeps us where we are. Fighting and resisting both fuel what we’re fighting and resisting.
We are more likely to do the things that align with feeling better, happier and healthier when we feel better because we are no longer beating ourselves up. Ideas will come to us. We feel inspired. We can keep feeling better and better, happier and happier. In my experience, that’s what happens. That then fuels doing things that help us to continue to feel better and better, happier and happier.
Remember: there is nothing to change!
Enjoy!
1. If you feel you want to change something, remind yourself that there is nothing to change; what is in front of you has already been allowed – by pure Awareness, i.e, you.
2. Rest in your essential nature of peace, happiness and fulfillment.
3. Align your thoughts, beliefs, activities, relationships and actions with your essential nature.
4. Trust that your being will know what to do.
With love,
Peggy O’Neal
www.peggy-oneal.com